Hey folx, (◕‿◕)♡
I know it's been a minute.
Kinda the flex right now, isn't it, for us all.
Russia is invading Ukraine, we're still in the wave of a pandemic... (but who's wearing masks? is COVID no longer airborne?). 'America' is so afraid of being seen as gay or baby killers, that the supreme court voted out progress, as it desperately held on to the right to own automatic weapons. All at the wise age of 18.
So ya, things are looking up from this old RV window. 凸(￣ヘ￣)
Why a Recreational Vehicle? you may ask... meant for travel and glamping. It seems a fitting metaphor for the physical body in which I reside currently. Mainly used for fun and adventure, it is usually overdressed for it's environment on a regular basis, and it refuses to stay parked for too long. Kinda also speaks directly towards the perspective I have towards everything that is occurring around the world. It isn't the safest shelter, but it can move fast enough and hide in a cave, or in some mountainous range, once I fit it with all terrain wheels of course. Must haves really, this shit is getting hairy yo.
We are all certainly bombarded with all kinds of conundrums lately.
There are a lot of instances in our life that are constant reminders on how fragile it all is...
How fragile we are. (￣￢￣ヾ)
Racism is still a thing, there has been over 280 mass shootings in America alone, yet women are still fighting for autonomy ( don't give it to us, we may just change the world!) The globe seems poised for another war... possibly because the war on drugs got boring, after Canada legalized marijuana. Interacting is more polarizing, thanks to the temporary lifestyle we had grown accustomed to; called 'social distancing'. Tension is a free commodity right now and they can't give it away fast enough.
I know, I usually spin a joke or two to lube the mind fuckery, but at the moment even I find it difficult to find equilibrium. Especially because I am now choosing celibacy over the act of filling out yet another dating profile, on yet another fast sex app. It is safe to assume most of us, if not all, are teetering on a mini stroke and no one has the alteplase for a safe return.
So as dismal as it all feels.
I want to remind myself and the .000000000000000000001 % of the Canadian populace that possibly read this blog, the cheesy yet very accurate saying:
"It gets worse, before it gets better"
I have seen this trend in my own life, proven more prevalent in the growth that happens after destruction in nature itself. Why would we, as lil baby consciousnesses of the universe, operate otherwise. We have to experience this shit so much we need to be sick of it. Done with it, like an abusive ex or a controlling mother. Somethings just no longer need our attention. America peddling its war machines, scrambling for dominance world wide... ya, that could be the first.
No offence 'Merica, in theory, your freedom sounds good... but it is limited to only a certain amount of people, a certain 'type' of people, and that is a false truth that will need righting at some point. It's how energy works, it simply cannot be the same for too long.
Even peace has an expiry date.
That's why I study the stars instead of watching the news, follow certain things like @Pubity and @shitheadsteve. I need to be reminded that people are doing great things and still take the piss out of them. Not taking any of this shit too seriously, so not to join the Ukraine in fighting a giant bully. It would be a poor attempt in ego, knowing full well that I may be more of a problem than a solution. To be honest it would likely be best that I am sent as a bomb, the kamikaze I am. (●_● )
Point being;
I am resetting my attention. What I realized throughout the pandemic, is that my mind is my only safe space, if I allow it. That means updating the hardware in the old RV. Removing the scarcity mindset embedded by some of my ancestors, by using the resilience and fortitude that came with the survival, of those same predecessors. Focus on healing myself, and being more aware of what I allow in my vision. No longer allowing a certain narrative take space rent-free in the brain meats. Since I have more than one disenfranchised people in my bloodline, according to generational trauma, I should have lost the will to breathe decades ago.
Alas, to the oppressor, I am still here.
Finally at peace with unintentionally taking up space, invading old vestibules of bigotry.
What would be the point of taking for granted the few rights I have, thanks to those same predecessors. How could I possibly throw away the opportunity to thrive, when so many before me only survived? What gets in the way? The scarcity mindset. The perceived lack in my life is simply because; The program was created by the privileged, to help pay for the 'privileged' way of life. I no longer want to pay for someones else's dream, especially one that has only stripped our planet of its resources and feeds the ego, rather than the creativity of people. I rather follow my ancestors, not those who tried to destroy them.
I realized the dream I have is relevant as well, life demands it. Life craves a new story, not just from me, but those who have never had a platform. We need other experiences to share, to witness. This existence is not enough, this scramble to survive, simply will not do. It's not enough, for most of us. I require more for my experience here, so I'm creating it.
How punk is that.
A blended woman of colour, making a name for herself, trying to entertain groups of folx by telling different stories. I am not trying to sell you on anything, except maybe some freedom from the inner saboteur. The privileged devil telling you what to be, what is beautiful, what is righteous. That shit is tired AF, and if you haven't guessed already... the leading contributor to waste, mental and physical.
So unlike what we all have been taught, programmed to believe, we are allowed other ways of being. We can speak up, change, alter our perspective, and grow...
After all, it is what life is, creation. I am here to say, if I can find a way to refit this old RV, also known as; the Retired Vagine. Well, my beautiful zygote, you can as well.
Create your life, celebrate in your skin, the world needs it. (っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ
We all do.